All the Days of Her Life
by pamela spurling
We knew from the day she was born that our daughter was, indeed, a very special gift. What we did not know, however, was that as special a gift she was, she’d need very special care, very special protection, very special nurturing. We also did not comprehend her great worth would be far above rubies. We did know this: we were to give her to the LORD that He would be all she needed---all the days of her life. So then, in the early days of her life, we dedicated her to the LORD, giving back to Him with praise and thanks the gift He’d given us, knowing that for a time we would have the privilege of nurturing and
guiding her.
In the years that would follow, we began to grasp, with a bit of understanding, three of the verses in Proverbs 31:
10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
All the rest of the proverb hinges on these verses and all the other attributes listed are to be a compliment to these three.
Recently, I read with interest a comment that a hope-chest may not be wise to give a young lady as it may distract her from following her first love (the LORD Jesus) and plans He may have for her. I will say that while marriage may not be in the future of every young lady, faith, character, knowledge, virtue, godliness and, yes, material goods are necessary preparations for our young ladies. For young ladies to not to be prepared for marriage is foolish as “all the days of her life” do not begin at the point of
marriage, rather they begin at the very beginning of her life. How marvelous God is in guiding us through His Word.
If at some future point, the LORD presents or reveals His plans by way of a young man’s interest in our daughter for marriage, then whatever seeds have been sown, whatever experience and knowledge she’s had or gained or decisions she’s made will define who she is and who the young man will have as his wife. I will say that the reverse is true as well… whatever his character, experience and knowledge is, will in turn be part of the foundation of their marriage.
All the days of her life… Will they have been days well spent? Will her walk, her activities, acquaintances, knowledge and skills be exemplary? Will any of her decisions or behavior bring shame? Will her character be such that her worth is far above rubies? Will her reputation of godliness precede her such that she will be known to be trustworthy to and for her husband?
You see, all the days of her life these traits or qualities are instilled, then develop and then yield rich fruit. This fruit, which is defined in Galatians 5.22-23 is “the fruit of the Spirit… love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance…” This nine-fold fruit is our prayer, hope and purpose for our daughter.
The understanding that “doing good and not evil all the days of her life” means all her past experiences have an affect on all her future days is certainly a humbling thought. It’s humbling and sobering because we have such a great responsibility to be ourselves in behaviour that becomes holiness. (Titus2) We have an incredibly high calling as guides to those whose price is far above rubies.
Reflecting on marriage as a picture of Christ and the church, our desire has been to guard and guide our daughter all the days of her life so that one day she might be presented to her husband not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but… holy and without blemish. (Taken from Ephesians 5.27).
So, practically, this means we have an obligation to foster a relationship and encourage depth with the Saviour. Then, that being the foundation, we must set about instilling virtuous character and a joyful heart---helping to equip her with the skills necessary to “look well to the ways of her household” that her “children will rise up and call her blessed” and that her husband will praise her---but above all, that she will be a woman who fears the LORD.
What a great and glorious honour we’ve had to be part of all the days of her life. May the LORD be our strength and may He be praised. Many blessings as you seek to serve Him.
pamela spurling
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