Pretty Girls

This letter is written in love and with sincere compassion to all the pretty girls who long to be "all that,"  to be in style, to look hot and be attractive to men and boys.

Dear Pretty Girls ~

I am thinking of you today... and my heart is heavy.  O, how I wish you'd come over so we can talk.  I have so much I wish I could share with you. I saw you at the store and I saw you walking by the school; I saw you at the library, and I saw you at the party; I saw you at the bank and I saw you on the bus.  I saw you at the game night and I saw you at church.  Everywhere I saw you, I saw other's eyes on you as well.  You nervously smiled at all the attention you were receiving.  It was almost embarrassing to you to be receiving all the looks you were getting and yet you loved it at the same time.  It was obvious that what you were craving almost made you sick at the same time.  It was as if you felt cheapened by all the gawking but you seemed to laugh it off, to brush it off - with even a bit of surprise and anger at the forwardness of those who were gazing at you and perhaps unbeknownst to you: undressing you with their eyes.

Perhaps my telling you this will cause you hostility and perhaps you'll be a bit defensive - telling me that I don't know where it's at or that I don't know what I'm talking about.  I understand that you might experience that reaction and that you might attempt to build an argument for your attitude and for the type of clothing you wear.  Most pretty girls attempt to cover their insecurity by dressing to please, dressing to attract and dressing to get a reaction.  But, sadly, when they get the reaction they thought they desired, they're most often left with an emptiness because they then realize the reaction was only selfish on the part of the ones giving the looks and attention... and they feel empty and used.

I wish you knew that you're a treasure.  I wish you could understand the damage you're allowing yourself.  And I wish I could convey to you how precious you really are and that your worth really is far above rubies - O, could you please stay for a cup of tea so that I could sit with you a bit longer to tell you that you need to guard the blessing of your life, the gift of your body and the precious treasure of the gift you will one day be to your husband?  You see... the man you will likely marry is somewhere out there.  You may or may not know him at this point now — but he is out there and along with all the other men, he's in a battle.  And if one of the men out there is your husband then you know what that means?  All the others are not.  Could you remain pure for him in thought, deed and appearance?  Could you protect the gift of your very life?

I wish you knew what you were really doing as you choose the type and style of your clothing each day and as you go about your work and activities.  I wish also that you knew what you are doing to all the men who are lusting after your enticing body.  I wish you knew what was really happening to you as an object of their lust.  I wish I could convey to you how dead-end it all really is when you entice others and they trip and fall over your beauty and sensual dress.   It's a dead end because they can never rightly or honestly or morally fulfill the desire they're experiencing at the time — nor can you, by the way.

I wish you knew the battles in the minds of men and how your behaviour eventually destroys them as they tangle themselves deeper and deeper into the sticky web of lustful thoughts and desires.  The things they love for a moment, they later loathe.  They loathe themselves later because they see your agreeable behaviour, your interest in them and they realize they never had any intention at all to actually draw you to themselves — for they were only window-shopping and you were buying.  Eventually you both lose.

I wish I could convey to you how your activities, your walk, the way you sit, the way you lean over, the way you bend in your tight jeans, the way you reach for things in your tight-fitting short tops — O, I wish I could tell you how you're giving away your precious self—your precious treasure and at the same time causing a war in the minds of young men who cannot escape your gaze.

O, how I wish I could convey how young men, old men and men in between think.  They are all enticed by the form of a woman.  They all are physically aroused by the provocative dress and behaviour of women.  Even if you are actually baring your skin, the hint of your form, the emphasis of your hips, your bottom, your thighs or your breasts will be driving their thoughts wild.

You may be thinking: great... that's what I want to do.  You may be thinking: Sicko's, they should get a handle on those thoughts.  You may be thinking: those perverts, they only have one thing on their minds.  You may be thinking:  Am I supposed to dress like a nun so they won't look at me?  You may be thinking:  what they do in their thoughts is *their* problem — not mine!

Or... you may be thinking.  No, no, no.  Not all guys are like that.  My guy friends are just not like that.  They do not think about all that stuff... we're just friends.

Ah, and there's where you would be wrong.

Your low pants, your sliver of skin, the tight shirts, the lace peeking out, the way your tight jeans emphasize your crotch, the slit up the back of your skirt... the eyes of men finish the form— they finish the lines, they finish the rest of what you think you're covering.  They guess if you're wearing a thong or if they can catch a glimpse of the type of bra you wear.  Please don't laugh and think this couldn't be true.  I tell you the truth, men are very, very visual— they may miss a lot of other things, the subtle nuances of things, but they are, indeed, very, very visual.

All men battle the lust of the eyes, lustful thoughts, lustful longings.  All men.

Where they are in the battle depends on how much they desire to have pure thoughts and pure motives and pure intentions.  Men who seek to follow after the LORD, men whose hearts are yielded to His ways are just as tempted as those who aren't walking with the LORD - please make no mistake - it is a battle. For all of them.  Ask your father, ask any man.  Hot clothes = hot men.  No kidding.  What a trap.

  But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
Matthew 5.28

By the grace of God, by shear faith and determination they fight the battle.

  "I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?"
Job 31.1

I wish I could convey to you this day the importance of modest dress and behaviour.  I wish I could somehow impress upon you that your clothing and behaviour matters and that men — young and old — are losing the battle with each passing of an enticing woman.  Your provocative clothing is actually mean and it's deceiving.  You sabotage attempts at righteousness with flirtatious, revealing clothing.  Ask any brother.

Fashions come and go, and though you think your popular, trendy reputation depends on wearing the latest fashion, I want you to know that your reputation depends on what you do with what you're reading today.

I love you, pretty girls, for if I didn't, I wouldn't have written to you today. And I would have let you walk on as an object of other's lusts and affections.  I couldn't do that and still love you.

 For ye were sometimes darkness, but now are ye light in the Lord: walk as children of light: (For the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness and righteousness and truth;) Proving what is acceptable unto the Lord. And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.
Ephesians 5.8-11

Please, girls... get dressed; as unto the LORD. And may He bless and direct your steps and be your all in all.


With love from your friend, pamela




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