An Embarrassing And Very Confronting Moment


Chris and I were invited to our friend's 60th birthday party last weekend. These friends are nominal Christians and known for their eccentric ways. They tend to live outside the box so to speak. We were told that it would be a low-key celebration with just this friend's friends- no family. The family celebration would be the next day. When we arrived, there were about 6 people; a married couple, a couple living together and a stylish-looking woman in her late 50's with a pixie-faced lean as a reed man about 45 in blue jeans with cowboy buckle, boots and grey cropped hair.

Introductions were going well when we suddenly were stopped in our tracks. Stylish Lady introduced herself and asked if we had met her "wife" yet? Suddenly it became apparent that Lean Man was in fact Lean Lady! We said the usual hellos and Chris turned his attention to the married couple at his side. The wife was obviously feeling uncomfortable by the same-sex couple and she wouldn't even look in their direction! The couple who were living together were obviously friends of Stylish Lady and Lean Lady, and had no qualms about their relationship. They were talking quite happily and I must admit I was sitting opposite them at a loss to know how to react to them.

I was in a dilemma.

The Bible condemns homosexuality and I do not care for it myself- but I did not want to ignore the couple completely. I sat there eating nibblies and silently praying for guidance. What would Jesus do here? I wondered. He sat amongst sinners and didn't ignore them, and Christ died for all men- and women. But then the gross immorality of Sodom and Gomorrah's lust for unnatural flesh reached the LORD'S nostrils and brought about its downfall. What to do? How could I reach out to them without feeling a hypocrite or worse still, ignore them and confirm to them that all Christians are judgmental? They knew that I was a Christian and they took great pains in their conversation to state that they were humanists.

So I decided just to sit and listen to them and try to find some common ground that we could agree on. Finally there was an opening in the discussion of Pay Pal and ebay. I found the women to be extremely intelligent and interesting. During the conversation my website was brought up because of issues with Pay Pal. They expressed some interest in it when I said it was a site for personalized verse. They expressed a desire to have a commitment ceremony written for them by myself, and I was at a loss to say no without being seen as judgmental. It was a terribly embarrassing moment! I mentioned the fact that I always have Scripture in my verses and they said that they wouldn't like that. They offered me the name of a lesbian site where there were Christian girls who would love to have a commitment ceremony written for them which included the LORD! They said there would be a lot of business through this site. I thanked them but can not bring myself to go to such a site.

I don't want to be like a Pharisee, but I don't want to make money from people living a life-style that is forbidden in Scripture. I don't hate the women but I was extremely uncomfortable when they were kissing each other at the table and Stylish Lady was patting Lean Lady on the knee. But then, I would be similarly embarrassed by a straight couple kissing like that in public. So I concentrated my attention on the other married couple who were clearly embarrassed by the lesbian couple. I trust that by talking to these women on a mutual level about matters other than their life-style, that I didn't come across as judgmental- but to be honest with you, I am.

I think it will be a long time before I can fully understand this type of relationship, if ever. I will never be able to accept it. I wonder too if the humanistic beliefs of these women is because they are inwardly running from God because they know that their relationship is inherently unnatural and sinful? It is for God to judge them, but all I can say is that I had a most uncomfortable evening- and the discomfort was from my own reaction, disgust, and fear of being a Pharisee as much as watching these two women relate to each other in a passionate way in front of us.

Days later, I can think of many things I could have said, but on this occasion, I had to think on my feet! One thing for sure though- no matter how I reacted and how I was perceived, it was a very interesting birthday party- and one I will never forget!


Glenys Hicks-2006


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