A Letter from Kathryn, January 20, 2008

Dear friends and family,

I pray the year has started off well for each one. After the first of the year, I jumped right back into teaching piano and nannying. I currently have eleven piano students. I also take care of two little boys on Mondays and Tuesdays, and then watch their cousins on Thursdays and Fridays. I’m also still doing a little bit of housecleaning in my spare time. God has really blessed me with these different opportunities to serve which makes my “work” truly enjoyable!

I first must apologize for seeming to “drop off the face of the earth” and not sending any kind of update my last week in Uganda or the weeks following my return to the states.

My last week in Uganda was incredibly difficult as I went through the “leaving” process. I had grown so attached to the children I was working with, the Ugandan women, and also the other amazing volunteers with whom I’d made friends.

As I went through the last few weeks, I couldn’t stop thinking that the “lasts” would be coming faster than I expected. The last dinner… followed by the last time helping the kids into jammies and bed. The last story read…. the last goodnight.

Bittersweetness flooded the days. On my last night in Uganda, I helped put the babies to bed and walked around, kissing each beautiful child, tears ran down my cheeks. I had learned the individual personalities and so greatly adored each and every child. I held “my” boy, Weiss, on the porch as the sun set. At that very moment, I knew that, though my heart was breaking, the fact that I’d given all I had to give; it had been so worth it. I’d rather live with the scars of true love than to close off and be free of pain.  It took every ounce of strength to put Weiss in his bed and walk away.

I came home so worn out and empty and, struggled to see the purpose in my being home. I had heard people refer to their “losing identity” after such an experience and I finally understood what they meant. I was so “needed” there in Uganda. Isn’t that what we all want in life: to be needed? What I didn’t see then was that my identity can only be found in Christ. While it’s easy to get wrapped up in “His” work, it’s imperative to see that He is the only thing to get wrapped up in. When my gaze slips off of Him, I will most definitely crash. Throughout the summer, God stretched me through many different events, continuing to pull me closer to Him. I learned so much about His grace and mercy, His perfect timing, and unconditional love for me. I learned the importance of making Him my All…we say that so easily, but do we really live it?

He’s blessed me so much with an incredible family and these incredible opportunities.
I so appreciate your love, concern, and prayers. I would ask that you continue to keep me in your prayers as I’ve been given the opportunity to RETURN to Uganda with a few of the friends I made while there last year! I will be leaving on February 25th…just less than 5 weeks from now!

I desire to be used to the fullest and so am open to more than just the baby cottage. While I WILL be going back there, I would also like to help at a home opened by a former Amani volunteer for school aged children. Her rapidly growing ministry is to offer meals, showers, bible studies, and homework help, among other things to the Ugandan kids. Please pray that God will use me to the fullest and that I would be able to set aside any preconceived ideas or feelings and simply serve!

Your prayers and support carried me through the last trip and I covet the same for this trip! Thank you and may the Lord bless you!

In Christ alone,
Kathryn

 

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